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Worst Pickup Lines You Can Use When Approaching a Woman

You’ll hardly find a guy who has never dreamed of picking up a gorgeous babe, but it’s a tricky task. When dealing with girls, the first impression is everything. Trust us, the line between “That’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard” and “Leave before I call the cops” is pretty thin. The thing’s that choosing the right words and speaking beautifully is a form of art, but unfortunately, there are not so many true smooth talkers out there. That’s why most acquaintances end before they even have a chance to start. And that’s sad. So next time you feel brave enough to strike up a conversation with that hottie next to a pool table, be sure to think carefully before saying anything.

Frankly speaking, pickup lines rarely bring the result you expect, even if you have a good one. At best, you’ll break the ice if your new companion has a sense of humor. At worst, you’ll end up saying something so lame that you’ll need a psychologist to start talking to women again. But whatever you may say, we doubt that you can top these 25 worst pick up lines ever. These will get your chances from “unlikely” to “not in a million years” in a few seconds.

what are the worst pickup lines

Main signs of bad pickup lines

Let’s say you and your pal have a small competition to find out who’s better at pickup lines. You turn a local bar into your hunting grounds and start chatting with ladies. You’re 100% sure you’ll win because you’re much more interesting as a communicator. But the time goes, and your buddy gets more and more numbers while your list remains empty. And you start wondering why some lines work and some don’t. You see, when it comes to terrible pick up lines, there are four major aspects that can ruin everything.

Too lengthy

An opener must always be laconic, first of all, because you may simply forget it, and the momentum will be lost. Besides, the girl may lose track of what you’re saying, and you’ll end up awkwardly staring at each other. So unless you’re after the most embarrassing experience in your life, learn to grab her attention with one or two short sentences.

Lack of creativity

Saying something generic is the worst mistake you can make. Most likely, the girl you’re about to talk to is so fed up with identical heaven-just-called phrases. She perfectly knows how to respond to bad pickup lines, and she’ll decide to reject you before you finish the sentence. You’ve probably heard that girls prefer smart and funny guys, so if you want your pick up line to hit the spot, make sure it’s original and (not necessarily) hilarious. If you can’t come up with one, don’t worry. Check out these group date ideas and ask one of your friends to get you acquainted with someone.

Insults and sexism

Yes, girls love when guys admire their bodies. No, they don’t like it when guys mention this in a conversation, especially when they do it in a direct, horny way. That’s why it’s not a good idea to say that she’s got a fine ass, even if it’s true. We live in the times of racial and sexual equality, and building up your line solely around the girl’s sexuality is at least impolite.


Do you really think a math-based pick up line would work on a random girl? Alright, it might, but only if it’s not too fancy. If you overdo it with creativity, there’s a chance your companion won’t understand your line. If you’re not OK with this and want to meet someone who would appreciate your wits, try your skill on women seeking men over 50.

Awful pickup lines examples

What are the worst pickup lines one can come up with? It’s hard to tell because no matter how bad a phrase sounds, someone will always make up one that’s worse. It’s incredible how dumb people may sound sometimes. If you think you’re not that good at picking up girls, these pickup lines will prove you wrong. Feel free to laugh your guts out.

how to respond to bad pickup lines1) "Are you an antique dealer? Coz I have an antique that hasn't been touched for years." Right, let’s jump straight ahead into penis jokes. This is one of those insulting lines that touch upon female sexuality, and since it’s one of the rudest mistakes, a phrase like this will never work on a decent girl.

2) "Kisses burn five calories per minute, and you look like you want to lose weight." Although this one isn’t too insulting (depending on your companion's complexes), its cheesiness doesn’t leave many chances for success. Still, not as cringy as the previous one, and it might make a girl laugh.

3) “Can you imagine that? My vacation has just begun, and my girlfriend has already drowned. Wanna take a vacant spot?” Do we really need to explain what’s wrong with this beach pickup line? It’s not too long, too complex, or too generic. It’s just stupid. It’ll never sound funny.

4) “Can I follow you everywhere? My parents always told me to follow my dreams.” There are really bad pickup lines, and there are mediocre ones. This phrase actually could work, but it’s too simple to use as an opener. If you’re interested in a positive outcome, it’s better to pick something more creative.

5) “Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf?” (No) “It’s fine, the other two pigs said no too!” This one can hardly be called a pickup line, it’s rather a harsh joke. It’s sure creative, but who cares if it’s so insulting that you risk getting a punch in the face?

6) “Did it hurt? (Did what hurt?) When you fell out of heaven?” It’s hard to believe, but some still use this line. It’s as uncreative as it can be, and phrases like this one show how much you really care about the woman you’re chatting with. You’ll get no chance with it.

7) "What's the difference between a hamburger and a boner? You're not giving me a hamburger right now." Again, too sexist and too horny. This phrase could work only if both you and your companion are totally drunk and having fun. Not as a pickup line but as a part of a conversation.

8) “I ain’t Fred Flintstone, but I can still make your bed rock.” Pop culture references are actually a cool thing, and we’ll talk about that later. However, as we already know, sex-related jokes are a bad idea for a pickup line. You can easily come up with something smarter.

9) “It’s a good thing I’ve got my library card coz I’m totally checking you out.” If you manage to use this line in a library, you’re the man! It’s probably the only place it would work, anyway. The line itself isn’t that terrible; it’s just been used so many times it’s lost its freshness.

10) “If women were boogers, I’d pick you first.” Well, it takes a lot of creativity to come up with something as gross as this one. Too bad being disgusting is one of the reasons why pickup lines are bad. Actually, the phrase is so awful that we challenge you to try it out.

11) “You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.” People just can’t get enough of insults. If something like that would work, there would be no single people left on this planet, we ensure you. Never insult a girl, especially the one you don’t know yet.

12) "Excuse me, I lost my teddy bear. Can I sleep with you instead?" As far as sex-related pickup lines go, this one isn’t as awful and humiliating as others, but it’s the same as saying that Spanish flu was better than the Black Death because it wasn’t as devastating.

13) “There must be something wrong with my phone because it doesn’t have your number in it.” “There must be something wrong with your creativity if you can’t put together something more interesting than this thousand-year-old line,” that’s what the girl would say if you start with this phrase.

14) "Your eyes are like limpid pools of primordial ooze, and I am the protozoa that wish to swim in their depths." And that’s a bright example of a fancy line. Besides being unattractive, it sounds too smart because it takes too much time to process.

15) “Are you my high school English teacher’s comments on my essays? Because you have fine written all over you!” When you say bad pickup lines, girls reject you. When you say long and bad lines, girls’ brains turn off for a moment, but then they still reject you.

16) "You have nice child-bearing hips. You will give me many sons." That’s one of the cringiest pick up lines one could ever come up with. Not only it scares women off, but it also makes you look like a weirdo. So unless you want to run around giving girls the creeps, don’t say anything like that.

17) “Your eyes are really cute. Oh, wait! I think the right one is a little cuter than the left one.” This one is so mediocre it doesn’t even sound weird. Well, maybe a little. There are dozens of ways to compliment a girl’s eyes.

really bad pickup lines18) "Hey, gorgeous. Is your name Wi-Fi? Coz I feel a connection." This could’ve been a nice pickup line. About 15 years ago. In another dimension. In our world, though, phrases like this no longer work, and it’s unlikely that they’ll ever do.

19) "I have a rare tropical disease which will kill me unless I have sex within the next half hour." Back to sex lines. The I’ll-die-unless-you-do-something jokes can work in some cases, but as long as there’s sex involved, no chance.

20) "You know, people tell me I look like (some hot celeb name)." The worst pickup lines are those that make you sound banal. And considering that this line is older than your grandparents, you’ll hardly sound banaler.

21) "If you were a potato, you'd be a really nice potato." If you try this one out a few times, you might even get someone’s attention with this one, but the chances aren’t that big.

22) “You know, I’m not really this tall. I’m just sitting on my wallet.” With lines like this one, you may as well keep sitting where you sit. You won’t impress the girl with it.

23) “If You Were A President, You’d Be Babe-Raham Lincoln.” Boom. Funny and original. Not. It’s one of those cringy lines that weren’t effective from the start.

24) “My love for you is like a fart. Everything about it is powered by my heart.” There are just outright negative pick up lines, and there are those that made entirely for fun and have no practical value. This is one of them.

25) “You look fabulous... For your age.” This line works perfectly if you want to piss a girl off and make fun of her.

Bonus: What makes a great pickup line?

So, what are bad pickup lines? These are a mix of poor creativity, hard-to-catch phrases, and painful insults. Then what are good ones? Is there a recipe for an ultimate line that would melt a girl’s heart? Let’s try to make one.

Individual approach

The key to a great pickup line is a pinch of individuality. The phrase must emphasize certain traits or features of your companion that you find cute. It’s better to avoid complimenting some of her body parts if you catch the meaning. Pick something neutral, like her, face, or hands.

Nice wording

This doesn’t mean that you should take a poetic approach, but if you can operate fancy words, use this to your advantage. Girls fall in love through their ears, but they start hating through them too. Don’t try to make the line too romantic.

Pop-culture references

This is what can give your line a comedic element. The only problem with such references is that you can’t always tell if the girl understands it. We suggest you build up the phrase around something modern and widely popular, like “The Game of Thrones” or something from the Marvel Universe.

It’s not that hard to make up a bad pickup line, but it takes some real talent to come up with one of the phrases from our list. Some of them are so terrible that may even work in some cases. But if your goal is to get a girl’s number, you should use something that won’t give her goosebumps.

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