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Relationship Deal Breakers: What Are They and How to Avoid?

In relationships, no matter how happy they are, there are ups and downs. It is normal. Thus, they develop and move to a new level. But are there any “signs” by which one can understand that something is going wrong? And what are the biggest deal breakers for women and men? Let’s figure it out!

relationship deal breakers

What Is a Dating Deal Breaker?

What are deal breakers in a relationship? Well, let’s draw some parallels first. Do you know what red flags are on a ski run? These are warning symbols that indicate danger, and a person slows down. In the same way, in relationships, according to some signs, you can determine what is in the person’s head, and you beware of this or at least think about it. Relationship deal breakers are red flags and the prerequisites for destruction. Love is one of the strongest feelings a person can experience. Many women seeking men online want to feel it. Of course, people in love have to face countless problems related to both their relationship and any other circumstances. Difficult situations affect the relationship between people. There are only two outcomes – either a couple breaks up, not overcoming the problems of life or withstands the pressure, and their love becomes stronger. Sometimes a little thing hurts our feelings. For example, our soulmates didn’t answer the call, forgot to talk about a significant event for us, or came home from work late. The fact is that we can perceive such actions as a manifestation of the indifference of a loved one, and this, according to scientists, causes us no less acute pain than serious physical trauma.

Relationship red flags and deal breakers are closely connected. As a rule, instead of describing our emotions, explaining to partners why their behavior worries us. And asking for support, we begin to blame them and shower with reproaches. After all, no one likes to admit their own weakness. If partners neither try to restore confidence nor sincerely talk about their feelings and understand each other, then they fall into a terrible vicious circle: their reactions provoke even more negative answers and emotions. Relations are becoming more destructive, and resentment and disunity are growing.

Are Deal Breakers Different for Men and Women?

In order to find a solution for any situation (even when planning a honeymoon), you need to understand why it developed, what led to the current state of things, what the reason for everything that happens is. Only a deep understanding of the reasons allows you to find the right solution.what are deal breakers in a relationship

The same can be said if you notice deal breakers in relationships. There is an explanation for each phenomenon, nothing happens for no reason. If the relationship spoils, then there is a reason. Most often, the cause of the separation is a banal misunderstanding. Women have one view of the world, while men have another one. Reluctance and inability to recognize the existence of this difference in views as well as understand the essence of these differences lead to an inability to understand your partner. Women expect romance, tenderness from a relationship, and want to feel the care that doesn’t come from any of their family members. But women often believe that only beauty is required of them in a relationship. They don’t show any initiative, how they love their men, and their tenderness and care. This approach is obviously doomed to failure. After all, a relationship develops only when both partners are ready to give each other more than they take.

When it comes to conflict, men, as everyone knows, are passionate about heated debates and tough skirmishes with competitors. But in relationships, they try to avoid all kinds of quarrels and prevent conflicts. In 90% of cases, women, on the contrary, only add fuel to the fire. Moreover, many psychologists say that relationships are much more important for men than for women.

Deal Breakers in Relationships with Women

At the beginning of relationships, you want to believe that everything is fine this time. You met the person you have always dreamed about. But in a state of falling in love, it is easy to lose sight of something important or, conversely, do everything as “accepted,” forgetting about what helps build harmonious relationships. We have a relationship deal breakers list that can spoil your relationships.

1. Violation of borders

When you don’t respect, that is, don’t recognize the personal boundaries of the partner as important, even if they seem wrong to you, you risk provoking an acute defensive reaction. A common mistake of many people in relationships is to expect a partner to behave as they want. But a much more powerful destructive factor for relations is the discussion of what is happening in a couple with other people. In fact, this is the introduction of third parties into a common space without an agreement with a partner.

2. Mistrust

When you have accumulated experience of failure in relationships, it can be extremely difficult to trust other people. Distrust is associated with a conscious or unconscious expectation that a partner will definitely do something unpleasant. This poisons relationships and gives a reason to increase control and violate the boundaries of the partner. Oddly enough, it is the fear of betrayal that is the factor that provokes betrayal in most cases.

3. Lie to yourself

What are some relationship deal breakers? Relationships can be destroyed not only by our dishonesty towards a loved one but also by the fact that sometimes we are not honest enough with ourselves. Sometimes, instead of getting bogged down in a net of self-deception, you should ask yourself, “Is this the person with whom I want to meet old age?” “Do I want to give myself to this relationship?” Many people avoid this by all means, fearing to stay alone. And this can be understood. But until you sincerely answer these questions, you can’t achieve harmony in the relationship.

4. Ignoring red flags

When a new partner says or does something that you strongly dislike, this is a red flag. It shouldn’t be ignored – on the contrary, it is worth paying attention to the situation and discussing it. After the discussion, it usually becomes clear whether the partner hears you and respects your feelings, values, and opinions. If not, this is already a relationship breaker: there is no need to go further. It is a danger zone. Although it can be difficult to come to terms with it, especially if it seems that everything was going just fine before that.

5. Treason

It is one of the most serious dating deal breakers. Treason is a real betrayal that can’t be forgiven. And even if a decision is made to continue the relationship, betrayal will remain in the head. But the fact is that a strong emotional blow is being dealt with, and everyone will remember about it during their whole conscious life. Making amends is impossible. And as statistics show, most people regret that they have forgiven their significant others after they cheated on them.

6. Differences of views

Some people simply can’t interact with each other. Of course, you can often hear the phrase: opposites attract. But there should be a common goal. Why does everyone forget about this? Each of the partners may simply not have the same views on certain things; accordingly, the right decision will never be made that will suit everyone.

7. Difficulties in communication

If you can’t speak openly with your partner in a relationship, or there is a misunderstanding in any situation – this is a bad signal. The point here is that you simply can’t exist side by side. Of course, you can try to live on. But, as practice shows, everyone will experience serious discomfort throughout their lives. Accordingly, happiness will not be reached.

8. Jealousy for no reason

Jealousy is a normal feeling for every person. However, jealousy must be moderate because this is one of the deal breakers for a woman. For example, if you are completely jealous of your woman, express your complaints and show distrust, the first scandals will appear. And more often than not, jealousy leads one of the partners to embody all reproaches into reality.

9. Quarrels

We are all living people, and disagreements are inevitable in relationships. Any couple on the path to happiness meets stumbling blocks sooner or later. Moreover, it is absolutely normal. Quarrels are part of a happy, healthy relationship because they help us open up and get to know each other. But this is possible only on one condition – if you never cross the line!

10. Criticism and reproach

The next deal breakers for guys are criticism and constant reproaches. There are no perfect people in this world. Each of us has their pros and cons, strengths, and weaknesses. Blame your partners for all failures, adversities, and problems, and after a fairly short time, your loved ones will think about a breakup, and if nothing changes for the better, they will just say goodbye to you.

How to Fight Relationship Deal Breakers

Instead of talking, sometimes partners move away from each other and don’t want to solve problems. However, experts say that difficulties must be overcome. What steps should be taken to improve your relationship and make it more successful? The following tips will be helpful in all cases.

1. Forgive your loved onerelationship red flags and deal breakers

Grievances tend to accumulate quickly but slowly dissolve. Therefore, there can be many reasons for resentment. But if a person is capable of forgiving another, then any relationship will improve and maintain their harmony and strength. Forgiving is not a simple matter. However, if you consciously approach this method, you will notice that your mood will cease to constantly change, and the soul will begin to respond more easily to the partner’s actions.

2. Accumulate “protection”

All people face injustice and bad situations that can offend them. But people who are not able to miss some offensive remarks past themselves, to take reasoned remarks in their direction to work them out, or treat unsuccessful events with humor have a difficult life. The easier you will react to what is happening around you and learn the biggest relationship deal breakers, the easier it will be for you to live.

3. Remember about the little things

Simple signs of attention, compliments, and support mean a lot. All these little things accumulate over time and affect the way you perceive your relationship. Therefore, many psychologists advise couples to continue to go on dates, get out somewhere on the weekend, and find time for sex even when you are tired. Physical proximity not only allows you to maintain healthy relationships but even helps establish them when something goes wrong.

4. Stop taking your girlfriend for granted

It can be very easy to take your girlfriend for granted after you have been together for a long time. Perhaps you are doing it out of ignorance. Therefore, think about your behavior with a partner. The worst part of this situation is that people who are shy and unsure of themselves will need time to understand that they are taken for granted. But as soon as they do this, they will be very offended.

5. Avoid insults and serious disputes

Avoiding abuse and controversy is the golden rule to improve your relationship. All insults and conflicting conversations will cause deep emotional wounds. Therefore, every time you understand that the conversation is getting too hot, you should better leave. By doing this, you will give yourself and your partner some time for introspection. And don’t forget to apologize when necessary and if you are wrong.

Having one or a couple of points is not an indication that your relationship is falling apart. It is very important to look in a complex and notice sharp changes. It is important to pay attention to them in time and prevent misunderstanding. Take care of your relationship if it is really worth it.

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