So, you are deeply in love with her, and she always looks at you with such tenderness. Your couple is happy together, and you are both ready for a serious relationship. So, everything is perfect except for the one, you are not yet familiar with her parents. Although no one knows for sure when to meet the parents, this day will come. It is clear that you want to make a good impression when meeting her parents for the first time to automatically save yourself from the possible troubles in the future.
But most likely you do not know what to talk about, what to wear to meet the parents, and you are afraid of an awkward situation or to seem silly. Of course, the future relationship with the mother-in-law and the father-in-law is greatly influenced by the first acquaintance. Do not worry, everything will be fine if you listen to the following tips.
The first thing that should be clearly understood: do not be afraid to act natural. Parents of your girlfriend are wise people with a lot of life experience, therefore, they understand that everyone has flaws, and if you worry about trying to seem too perfect, then this will not play a positive role in the future. This also includes petty lies in the hope of embellishing your achievements. And what about the rest of the tips? This is what we are going to talk about today.
Meeting the Parents for the First Time Tips
1. The process of preparation
You need to ask your girlfriend about her parents in order to understand what to be ready for at the meeting. They will be interested in your source of income, and whether it will increase over time. They may also ask what plans you have for their daughter. Do you think about the wedding, do you want children, and do you take your relationship seriously? Find out about this in advance, ask about how her parents treated her other guys, what they liked about them, and what was annoying them.
2. What to wear when meeting the parents?
First, things must be clean, neat and ironed. It will tell a lot about you. Also, forget about loose oversized things or too tight jeans. This teenage style has nothing to do with a serious meeting. No, we are not telling you to wear a three-piece suit. You can dress simply but with taste so that parents have a pleasant impression. Also, do not forget about the haircut and manicure. As a last resort, ask your girlfriend for help. She will certainly tell you what to wear when meeting the parents in order to please them.
3. Gather information
Meeting her parents can be compared with a job interview. And in fact, you need to have enough information. You have to find out who they work as, find out about their hobbies and things that her family loves. Be sure to learn their names and find out which topics are best not to touch.
4. Try to like her mom
Do you remember the famous saying that the husband is the head and the spouse is the neck? You should try to please her mom as much as possible. In addition, the opinion of the mother is very important for all girls. And what mom will say to a girl after your acquaintance can affect your relationship. So your number one challenge is to make a good impression on her mom. Think about a few compliments and don't forget about a sense of humor, and everything will be fine.
5. Make friends with her father
The situation with fathers is a little bit more difficult. It is much harder for them to accept any man who will be near their daughter. Fathers are more tender with daughters. They love them with a slightly different love than they love sons. And girls forever remain little for them. Therefore, he will initially stay on alert about you. Learn from your girlfriend what her father loves and what he enjoys. It will be cool if you find common interests or the same views on some issues.
6. Be confident
Self-confidence is great when meeting your girlfriend's parents. It is necessary to show that you love yourself and know your own worth within acceptable limits, of course. Any parents want to see a self-confident man next to their daughter, not a whiner or a narcissist. You should get together and not get lost if any unexpected circumstances arise. Or if they start asking you tricky questions. React to it as if everything is normal, and nothing has happened. Believe us, this behavior will not go unnoticed.
7. Keep a pleasant conversation
This is exactly the quality that will save you many times in any circumstances. You can tell jokes, just make sure that all of them fit into this family’s views and atmosphere. Wit and sense of humor are excellent features, so it would be nice if you could show them. Remember that it is not necessary to please everyone. If you are asked for your opinion on a particular topic, then answer honestly and do not be afraid to say something wrong.
8. Be ready for interrogation
Do not forget that this is your first meeting, so it’s normal that her parents will overwhelm you with questions. You don't need to be nervous or frantic over this. Patiently answer each of them when meeting the girlfriend's parents. Parents want to know as much as possible about the person with whom their daughter lives. This is a normal desire, and you should better satisfy it. You should also be prepared to feel uncomfortable because of the questions. Do not worry, they just get to know you.
9. Farewell
Shake hands with father, hug mom. Be sure to thank the parents for their hospitality and for cutting the time out to meet you. You can invite them in response somewhere, without designating a specific time or place. Just say it would be great to meet again. Be sure to offer your help in cleaning if you were at home with her parents. Or take out the trash. Mom will appreciate such a gesture. Do not insist that the girl leaves with you. If she wants to spend some more time with the family after your meeting, let her stay.
What to Talk About When Meeting Parents?
One of the important tips for meeting the parents of your girlfriend is to be ready to talk a lot and answer a ton of questions. You should understand that they want to know as much about you as possible. Of course, apart from reacting to the topics, they start discussing, you can initiate a conversation yourself. Here is some advice about it.
What to Talk with the Girl's Parents?
- Work or study;
- Future plans;
- Your family;
- Equipment and sports;
- Hobbies;
- Pets or plants.
Taboo Topics
- Religion;
- Politics;
- Unemployment and wages;
- Family problems;
- Diseases;
- Nationality;
- Other people, including ex-lovers.
Apart from re regular conversation, be ready to experience a real interview concerning everything her parents would like to know about you. You will have to go tackle this one of the hardest tasks and answer them. Also, don’t think that the parents of your beloved one want to put you down or give you a challenge, that is just the natural interest. Of course, they should know their future son-in-law. Here are several types of uncomfortable parents' questions and how to deal with them.
Question 1. Whether your intentions towards their daughter are serious. You can’t get away from this question, it is inevitable. If you didn’t decide for yourself yet or you both are not sure about your future, don’t lie to them. It is important that you describe everything as it is. This will be quite enough if the visit isn't about a specific goal of starting a conversation about the wedding.
Question 2. About family and children. Be sure to hear the question concerning your family values or children. Even if you are not ready to have babies now, answer softly not to disappoint them. It is your life, and the parents should understand it. So, try to answer as you feel. If there are no children in the near future planned, it is not necessary to declare frankly that your girlfriend will have children only over your dead body. You just need to focus on the fact that everything is ahead, and now it is too early to think about it.
Question 3. About future plans. The question about plans for the near and not so near future can be answered directly. Everyone has their own plans and dreams, you can voice them. For example, graduate/ go to university/ find a job/ build a career/ start a family, etc.
Question 4. About your life. What is your hobby? Where do you study? What kind of person are you? What do you like/dislike? etc. There are lots of options. When answering, you can talk about your positive traits of character and hobbies. But don’t embellish things too much, otherwise, you will seem a narcissist boaster. Tell them about your work and achievements.
What to Bring When Meeting Her Parents?
Gifts for meeting the parents are highly required. Coming to the girl's parents for the first time with empty hands is a bad idea. In order to defuse the situation and to make a positive impression from the first minute, it is better to pre-select and purchase a small gift. The basic rules for choosing a gift for the girl's parents: neither too cheap nor very expensive. A cheap gift is unlikely to look good and will characterize you from the wrong side. A gift that is too expensive may put the parents in an awkward situation. It is risky to give a funny gift, and ambiguous gifts may be misunderstood. Besides, the present should match their taste. It is better to discuss the issue of a gift with your girlfriend in advance.
She knows her parents and their taste preferences better.
As for a gift to her mom, the next options are possible:
- Flowers;
- Candies;
- Decor items;
- Beautiful accessory;
- Favorite perfume;
- Something for the kitchen (original dish, plate, etc.);
- Scarf.
When choosing a gift you should definitely consult with a girl. What if her mom is allergic to flowers or sweets? It will be great to know what perfume, candy, accessories she likes.
Gift options for her dad:
- Good alcohol;
- Cigars;
- Accessory for the car;
- Tie;
- New computer game or playstation.
The gift should be selected depending on his tastes and situation. You can give something relevant to both parents at once. For example, tickets to the movie, theater, or a concert. The main thing is to show attention and interest in communication.
The Summary
So, to summarize main tips on how to meet your girlfriends parents, we don’t recommend you to drink a lot during the evening, your appearance and behavior should say the parents that you can be trusted with their beloved child, as well as you can express your feelings for their daughter during the meeting and say how much you love her. Waiting for this day is worse than the meeting itself. Do not worry, everything will be fine. After all, your girlfriend is in love with you, and it means that her parents will like you too!