It is almost impossible to find a person who would honestly be willing to spend his or her life alone. A desire to meet girls now is in men's nature. The same goes for women who want to find guys of their dreams. In fact, no matter who you like or even love, we all want to be with someone. Another interesting fact about relationships is that everyone can find a suitable partner. For example, overweight dating tips for a guy help thousands of guys to settle their lives. Furthermore, some people, even like obesity. Consequently, no matter who you are and what you look like, there is always someone who is willing to spend his or her life with you.
So, does our desire means that we actually can put other people in the first place in our lives? Unfortunately, not always. You see, without a single doubt, a person can get a lot from a relationship with someone. This includes support, understanding, learning new skills, joy, and many other pleasant things. However, we can't forget that in order to receive all those things from a relationship or a partner, one must also invest something in his or her relationship. Some people encounter problems at this stage. And these problems are not only related to their inability to invest, quite often problems arise due to very unexpected reasons. In the most severe cases, those problems make people ask how to know when to leave a relationship.
Is it easy to leave a relationship?
When people encounter tough times in their relationships and even begin to ask: "when is it time to leave a relationship?" they have two options. The first option is to stay in unhealthy relationships and try to change something. And the second option is to leave their partners. Remember, even if you intentionally search for signs to leave a relationship, there may be a hope that your relationship can be saved. At the same time, the longer you stay in an unhappy relationship with an unloved person, the more pain you will have. So, is it easy to leave a relationship? In simple terms, no, it is not going to be a very easy task. When partners have a relatively healthy relationship, they probably struggle with some problems that add a lot of negative to their lives, but they also have many benefits. Those benefits create an emotional and physical connection between them. These bonds can't be broken in a day. For example, even if your partner used to abuse you, you will still be missing his or her smile from time to time. The reason for this is that not everything was bad between you two.
Additionally, there may be other problems. For example, one of the worst reasons why some people keep living together is because how can you possibly leave your partner if you have no idea how to leave a relationship when you have no money. You can never neglect financial matters. This is because, after breaking your relationship, you may find yourself without a single coin in your friend's house. This shows and explains why you must plan everything before leaving your relationship. If you have many reasons to leave a relationship and are planning to do so, you must very carefully plan your every move and step to make sure that everything will be fine.
What does it lead to when you hesitate to leave a relationship?
Without a single doubt, leaving your relationship is not going to be the easiest task in your life, but you can't hesitate when it comes to this. You were right that before taking any steps, you wanted to know when to leave a relationship because it is crucial to understand when you can still save your relationship and when a breakup is the only possible way out from this crisis. In healthy relationships, partners constantly, and efficiently work on resolving their problems. As you have guessed, unfortunately, this is not the case with your relationship. In the end, this is one of the main reasons why you want to know how to leave a relationship, right?
So, when you are in an unhealthy relationship, you accumulate your problems. This fact is closely related to another fact that your relationship always develops. If you efficiently resolve your problems, it develops in a positive direction. However, if your problems accumulate, your relationship will begin to develop in a very negative one. Thus, the longer you wait and hesitate to end an unhealthy relationship, the bigger problems you will have, and the more you will suffer. This is a rule. All that you can do is to decide how to use the time that you have left until the situation becomes too dark.
Consequently, to avoid huge problems and undesired pain, you should clearly understand whether you still can save your relationship, or must immediately leave. In the first case, you need to immediately arrange a serious conversation with your partner to begin resolving your problems. In the second case, you shouldn't hesitate any second. Hesitation may be dangerous for your emotional and even physical health if you are dating an abuser. In fact, you should start making your escape plan right after reading this article. Remember, it becomes harder to leave a relationship with each passing day.
The main signs that it’s time to leave the relationship
As we have already mentioned before, you must make a clear decision whether you want to leave or try to save your relationship. To make this decision, you will have to analyze a huge number of different factors. Don't expect this to be easy, because it won't. In this part of the article, we are going to share the main signs you need to leave your relationship. Surely, none of those signs mean anything on its own, but if you have multiple signs, then it should be clear that you need to end this relationship once and for all.
1. An Abusive relationship
It should be clear that if a person loves you, he or she will never emotionally or physically hurt you. Surely, a partner may do this unintentionally, when one of you says or does something wrong. But there is a big difference between situations when your partner accidentally abuses you, and when he or she is a real abuser. In the first case, you will hear their apologies, and this situation won't happen again. In turn, a real abuser will never admit that he or she is wrong. Thus, you will feel that you are guilty and made him or her abuse you.
2. Cheating
This is the most obvious sign ever. So, if you are in a monogamous relationship, you should never tolerate and accept cheating. A cheating partner by his or her actions simply destroys the main foundation of healthy relationships. How can you trust and be open to a person who has cheated on you? Also, this has a lot to do with respect. After all, if you truly respect your partner, then you will never cheat on him or her, right? Of course, in some cases, you can forgive your partner and get over this situation, but only if he or she sincerely admits their mistake and changes behavior.
3. Problems with respect
You must understand that it is not possible to build a happy relationship if you don't respect each other. Respect is essential for a healthy relationship. A person will never be able to truly open and relax if he or she doesn't feel respected. Consequently, you should never tolerate such behavior, especially from your significant other, who is meant to care and love you. When your partner doesn't respect you, it means that they also don't value you. The most obvious sign of the lack of respect in a relationship is when your partner makes decisions that are aimed to make only him or her happy.
4. Lies
A topic about white lies is indeed highly disputable, and our society still can't decide whether white lies are good or bad for romantic relationships. However, it is clear that lies are bad for relationships. In fact, the damage from deceiving or lying in a relationship can be compared to the damage caused by cheating. Some even believe that lying is a form of emotional cheating. And again, it means that your partner doesn't value as much as he or she should. Also, lies often come very close to gaslighting, which is very dangerous to your emotional conditions.
5. Unpleasant tension
In healthy relationships, partners literary thrive when they spend time together. In fact, they just can be around each other, and will still feel this positive energy coming from their significant others. As you have guessed, you won't face anything like this in unhealthy relationships. So, if you feel that there is a constant tension between you, and if you can't even relax when your partner is around you, then it should be clear that the time has come to leave your relationship. Obviously, you may try to save your relationship, but it may be just a waste of time and effort.
6. Emotional distance
One of the biggest differences between healthy and problematic relationships is that in the first case, partners constantly work on their emotional connections. In the best cases, they have no emotional distance at all and can understand each other even without words. The reason why emotional distance appears in relationships lies in micro-problems, which may destroy even the healthiest relationships if partners don't try to do anything about them. No matter how hard you try to save your relationship, at a certain point, you may need to be ready to put this relationship to an end.
7. You want to change each other
You see, it is okay if you both want to become better versions of yourselves for the sake of your relationship. For example, it is normal if you want to quit smoking or drinking to make your partner happier because he or she doesn't do this. However, it is not okay when he or she puts pressure on you and makes you quit smoking or do anything else. In healthy relationships, partners change because they want, and not because they are forced to. Consequently, it should be clear that you need to reconsider your relationship if you or your partner expect each other to change and become different people.
Tips how to correctly leave a relationship
Not without a good reason, we advised you to plan your breakup ahead. You see, it is a very complicated, and, in some cases, even a rather nasty challenge. Some people, even make this situation even worse, because they don't understand how to leave a long-term relationship without insulting or offending their partners, and without turning the whole situation into a real mess. So, we hope that now you know when it's time to leave a relationship, and the time has come for us to share with you some tips on how to do it correctly and avoid all potential damage.
1. Don’t let your emotions control you
When leaving your relationship, it is very easy to become very emotional. After all, you may still have many emotional ties with your partner. But, you must control your emotions. Otherwise, you will make many potentially dangerous mistakes. It is obvious that this will make this process even harder for both of you.
2. Don’t change your mind
Remember when we were saying that you must be very careful when you decide whether to leave your relationship or not? If you decided to leave, you should stick to your decision. Don't change it right in the middle of the whole process, because this will only add more drama to the whole situation.
3. Find support
It is obvious that breaking up with your significant other is not going to be easy. Remember, no one can or should go through this alone. This is why you need to make sure that you will have a supported way before leaving your relationship. For example, surround yourself with your relatives or good friends.
4. Value yourself
You deserve much better than this! By thinking this way, it will be much easier for you to leave an unhealthy relationship. Normal people don't live in mud, right? So, why should you force yourself to do this? You want, and what is more important can have a better life, and this is why you leave your partner.
5. Do it tete-a-tete
Even if you had a very bad relationship, your partner still deserves to hear this all tete-a-tete. It feels very bad when your partner leaves you via email or text message. For example, you may choose a public place to have this conversation, if you expect him or her to have a violent reaction.
6. Be honest with your partner
It is clear that everyone wants to know why their partner leaves them. Due to this fact, you definitely should give your partner this opportunity to listen to your reasons to leave him or her. However, make sure that your honest words won't insult your ex-partner. So, try to choose nice ways to say what you want.
7. Don’t get involved in arguments
You have made your decision, and you are not going to change it. When you try to explain this to your partner, there is no point in getting involved in arguments. This won't change anything, then why on Earth you need to do this. Remember, empty arguments always are very exhausting.
8. Don’t turn your ex into “the monster”
There are no perfect people. We all have our faults, and you won't win or achieve something by turning your partner into evil. As always, both partners are responsible for problems in their relationship. Even if they did some bad things like cheating or lying, but they are humans, and making mistakes is a part of our being.
9. Don’t push yourself
Even if you are initiating your breakup, it is still going to be a very hardcore task for you. You may not be able to recover from it very fast, and you don't have to force yourself to. Just give yourself some time to grieve. But don't fall into a depression, because you may not be able to recover from it very fast.
10. Don’t stay alone
After breakups, people often feel lonely. To deal with this matter, try to spend as much time as you can with other people. This may not be your trustworthy friends or relatives who always support you. Even random chat in a coffee shop where you prefer to work will help.
So, when should you leave a relationship? You should do this as soon as you see that there is nothing you can do to save your relationship. In this case, the time has come for you to be a little bit selfish. After all, there is nothing good in being in a doomed relationship. With time, your ex-partner will understand this too. A breakup will pass relatively easily if you feel that your love has already perished. In this case, you will only have to deal with the habit of being with this person. However, it is always better to be prepared for worse. So, don't expect that this is going to be easy.